Food

Last week, I had a food rant. It didn't achieve anything, it was the first in a few years, it was about two minutes long, and it went something like this:

"Waaaah! I want a cinnamon roll. I want Cafe Rio. I want Wisconsin cauliflower soup. I want buttered toast. I want salsa. I want to eat whatever I want and not have to check ingredients. I want to eat out. I want potlucks to be okay. I want to feel full. I want cinnamon bears. I want Olive Garden salad and breadsticks and pasta. I want to travel and eat any food I want instead of bringing a pantry wherever I go!"

My relationship with food has changed with time as it has felt more and more and more like an enemy with each new food intolerance and recurring-to-constant bellyaches, ranging in severity from annoying to wondering if I was truly, truly dying.

I've remarked many times that I wish I could plug myself into the wall overnight to charge, like my cell phone. But then I remember how grateful I should be to ingest food! Plus, God could have given us an easy system to recharge, but He expects us to figure out how to eat three times a day, 365 days a year. What a challenge and privilege. (But sometimes I'd still like to request some manna.)

First I looked at forbidden foods as worth the occasional bellyache, then with longing as bellyaches became not worth it, then with complete disinterest. But during this rant, I wanted to binge on all of it, just once. I blame hormones. And hunger. I was "hangry."

This is how I eat now:

I eat the Paleo way because it is helping me so much. Paleo is meant to reduce inflammation. Some think because I eat the Paleo way that I am a carnivorous carb hater. I do not eat Paleo to be picky, snooty, or condescending. I resist fads, but it was recommended for me to try...and for me, right now, it works. With my food allergies I was almost down to the Paleo diet without even realizing it. It's nice to have a label now for the way I eat.

Paleo is grain-free, legume-free (including soy), dairy-free, and sugar-free. It consists of fruits, vegetables (but no corn; and no peppers or tomatoes for me), meats, nuts, seeds, and some naturally occurring sugars sometimes like raw honey, coconut sugar, or pure maple syrup.

Interestingly, as a very young adult, I recognized my poor eating habits of the time and prayed to Heavenly Father to help me change. I asked for a desire to enjoy vegetables and good foods so I could magnify the body He gave me with good health and pass healthy habits to my future family.

I actually hoped for an instant change--that I would suddenly like carrots, crave broccoli, and prefer fruit to fruit snacks. When it didn't happen all at once, I'd forget about it. Then after lots more bad food choices, I would supplicate again.

Well, wouldn't you know that YEARS later, my body tolerates only those healthy foods I desired to crave in the old days. I'm a little extreme right now, but I acquired a taste for nutrient-dense food out of necessity. My guts feel much better. I seek out carrots, chomp on homemade sauerkraut, and eat apples like they're candy. (Diminishing taste receptors with age helps; carrots used to taste like dirt to me as a kid, and now I eat them just fine.) My chocolate chip cookies are made with almond flour, and I feel justified in having them for breakfast sometimes. Hello protein!

Lyme manifests differently in different people, but my gut has been greatly affected. In the mystery hunt before my diagnosis, my family made changes in the way we eat.

My family eats much better than we did, say, three years ago. They don't always eat like me, but we are all better off because of the enhanced food awareness. My taller half bought Doritos about a year ago after not having them for a very long time, and he said all he could taste was chemicals. Over time I think our bodies slowly detoxed from food chemicals as a family, and we found ourselves sometimes blatantly tasting the sugars, preservatives, artificial colors, artificial sweeteners, and artificial flavors in our foods and "food-like products."

It hit me just the other day, that in His own time and in His own way, God has surely been answering my prayer. I have come so far! I am grateful for this journey of food challenges just for that blessing alone. Plus, I've picked up a lot of interesting food ideas along the way that I'll keep even if I can eat anything one day (example: Paleo pizza crust es delicioso).

What blessings come from trials! This is another testament to me that everything Heavenly Father gives us is a blessing. Anything He gives us that brings us closer to Him is also a blessing (pssst, that includes our trials).

I'm grateful for answered prayers. This isn't the journey I expected to begin desiring good food, but I feel like I've paid the price as much as I could, and I cherish this journey because of the things I've learned and the effort I've given. I have earned this newfound desire for wellness.

Thank Thee, Father!